DID you ever meet a brother as you hurried on your way
And invite him up to dinner, and his wife;
Did you ever keep him standing until he had named the day
When you’d meet to talk about your early life?
Did you ever say: ‘Next Tuesday we’ll expect you up to dine,’
And repeat it so he’d have no cause to doubt it?
Did you ever make him promise to come up and taste your wine,
And then forget to tell your wife about it?
Did you ever get home feeling just as happy as a bird,
Kiss your smiling wife and settle down to tea,
And then get a sinking feeling in your insides as you heard
The door bell ring? This has occurred to me.
Has a single pork chop lying on a cold and greasy dish
Ever furiously set your heart to drumming,
As your guests arrived that evening in obedience to your wish,
And you hadn’t told your wife that they were coming?
Oh, I do not care for riches, and I do not sigh for fame,
And I do not yearn for glory or for power,
And I don’t care if I never learn to win a billiard game
At the present rate of 40 cents an hour.
With my lot I’d be contented, and I know I’d happy be
And I’d go my way a bit of music humming,
If I only could remember when I ask folks up for tea
To inform my darling wife that they are coming.