Hilaire Belloc

The Nicest Child I Ever By Hilaire Belloc

The Nicest Child I Ever By Hilaire Belloc

The nicest child I ever knew Was Charles Augustus Fortescue. He never lost his cap, or tore His stockings or his pinafore: In eating Bread he made no Crumbs, He was extremely fond of sums, To which, however, he preferred The Parsing of a Latin Word– He sought, when it was within his power, For... »

The Vulture Eats Between By Hilaire Belloc

The Vulture Eats Between By Hilaire Belloc

The Vulture eats between his meals, And that’s the reason why He very, very, rarely feels As well as you and I. His eye is dull, his head is bald, His neck is growing thinner. Oh! what a lesson for us all To only eat at dinner! ~ – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 6 »

Who Was Cursed With The By Hilaire Belloc

Who Was Cursed With The By Hilaire Belloc

Who was cursed with the Sin of Pride, and Became a Boot-Black. Godolphin Horne was Nobly Born; He held the Human Race in Scorn, And lived with all his Sisters where His father lived, in Berkeley Square. And oh! The Lad was Deathly Proud! He never shook your Hand or Bowed, But merely smirked and nodd... »

Pale Ebenezer Thought It By Hilaire Belloc

Pale Ebenezer Thought It By Hilaire Belloc

Pale Ebenezer thought it wrong to fight, But Roaring Bill (who killed him) thought it right. ~ The Pacifist – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 3 »

Who Played With A By Hilaire Belloc

Who Played With A By Hilaire Belloc

Who played with a Dangerous Toy, and suffered a Catastrophe of considerable Dimensions When George’s Grandmamma was told That George had been as good as gold, She promised in the afternoon To buy him an Immense BALLOON. And so she did; but when it came, It got into the candle flame, And being ... »

It Was My Shame, And Now By Hilaire Belloc

It Was My Shame, And Now By Hilaire Belloc

It was my shame, and now it is my boast, That I have loved you rather more than most. ~ Time Cures All – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 2 »

The Tiger, On The Other By Hilaire Belloc

The Tiger, On The Other By Hilaire Belloc

The tiger, on the other hand, Is kittenish and mild, And makes a pretty playfellow For any little child. And mothers of large families (Who claim to common sense) Will find a tiger well repays The trouble and expense. ~ The Tiger – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 10 »

As A Friend To The By Hilaire Belloc

As A Friend To The By Hilaire Belloc

As a friend to the children Commend me the Yak. You will find it exactly the thing: It will carry and fetch, you can ride on its back, Or lead it about with a string. The Tartar who dwells on the plains of Thibet (A desolate region of snow) Has for centuries made it a nursery pet, And surely the Tar... »

Who Was Frightened By A By Hilaire Belloc

Who Was Frightened By A By Hilaire Belloc

Who was frightened by a Passing Motor, and was brought to Reason “Oh murder! What was that, Papa!” “My child, It was a Motor-Car, A most Ingenious Toy! Designed to Captivate and Charm Much rather than to rouse Alarm In any English Boy. “What would your Great Grandfather who W... »

Pelagius Lived At By Hilaire Belloc

Pelagius Lived At By Hilaire Belloc

Pelagius lived at Kardanoel And taught a doctrine there How, whether you went to heaven or to hell It was your own affair. It had nothing to do with the Church, my boy, But was your own affair. No, he didn’t believe In Adam and Eve He put no faith therein! His doubts began With the Fall of Man... »

When I Am Living In The By Hilaire Belloc

When I Am Living In The By Hilaire Belloc

When I am living in the Midlands That are sodden and unkind, I light my lamp in the evening: My work is left behind; And the great hills of the South Country Come back into my mind. The great hills of the South Country They stand along the sea; And it’s there walking in the high woods That I c... »

Inviting The Influence By Hilaire Belloc

Inviting The Influence By Hilaire Belloc

Inviting the influence of a young lady upon the opening year You wear the morning like your dress And are with mastery crown’d; When as you walk your loveliness Goes shining all around: Upon your secret, smiling way Such new contents were found, The Dancing Loves made holiday On that delightful grou... »

The Moon On The One By Hilaire Belloc

The Moon On The One By Hilaire Belloc

The moon on the one hand, the dawn on the other: The moon is my sister, the dawn is my brother. The moon on my left and the dawn on my right. My brother, good morning: my sister, good night. ~ The Early Morning – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 8 »

Who Was Too Freely Moved By Hilaire Belloc

Who Was Too Freely Moved By Hilaire Belloc

Who was too Freely Moved to Tears, and thereby ruined his Political Career Lord Lundy from his earliest years Was far too freely moved to Tears. For instance if his Mother said, “Lundy! It’s time to go to Bed!” He bellowed like a Little Turk. Or if his father Lord Dunquerque Said &... »

Of Three In One And One By Hilaire Belloc

Of Three In One And One By Hilaire Belloc

Of three in One and One in three My narrow mind would doubting be Till Beauty, Grace and Kindness met And all at once were Juliet. ~ A Trinity – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 3 »

When Jesus Christ Was By Hilaire Belloc

When Jesus Christ Was By Hilaire Belloc

When Jesus Christ was four years old The angels brought Him toys of gold, Which no man ever had bought or sold. And yet with these He would not play. He made Him small fowl out of clay, And blessed them till they flew away: Tu creasti Domine Jesus Christ, Thou child so wise, Bless mine hands and fil... »

Ill Fares The Land To By Hilaire Belloc

Ill Fares The Land To By Hilaire Belloc

Ill fares the land to hast’ning ills a prey (1) Where wealth accumulates and men decay.’ But how much more unfortunate are those Where wealth declines and population grows! (1)This line is execrable; and I note it. I quote it as the faulty poet wrote it. ~ On Vital Statistics – Hil... »

The Microbe Is So Very By Hilaire Belloc

The Microbe Is So Very By Hilaire Belloc

The Microbe is so very small You cannot make him out at all, But many sanguine people hope To see him through a microscope. His jointed tongue that lies beneath A hundred curious rows of teeth; His seven tufted tails with lots Of lovely pink and purple spots, On each of which a pattern stands, Compo... »

Who Slammed Doors For By Hilaire Belloc

Who Slammed Doors For By Hilaire Belloc

Who Slammed Doors For Fun And Perished Miserably A trick that everyone abhors In little girls is slamming doors. A wealthy banker’s little daughter Who lived in Palace Green, Bayswater (By name Rebecca Offendort), Was given to this furious sport. She would deliberately go And slam the door lik... »

Of All The Gods That By Hilaire Belloc

Of All The Gods That By Hilaire Belloc

Of all the gods that gave me all their glories To-day there deigns to walk with me but one. I lead him by the hand and tell him stories. It is the Queen of Cyprus’ little son. ~ On the Little God – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 3 »

Torture Will Give A By Hilaire Belloc

Torture Will Give A By Hilaire Belloc

Torture will give a dozen pence or more To keep a drab from bawling at his door. The public taste is quite a different thing- Torture is positively paid to sing. ~ The Evenlode – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 8 »

I Shoot The Hippopotamus By Hilaire Belloc

I Shoot The Hippopotamus By Hilaire Belloc

I shoot the Hippopotamus With bullets made of platinum, Because if I use leaden ones His hide is sure to flatten ’em. ~ The Hippopotamus – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 3 »

The Lion, The Lion, He By Hilaire Belloc

The Lion, The Lion, He By Hilaire Belloc

The Lion, the Lion, he dwells in the Waste, He has a big head and a very small waist; But his shoulders are stark, and his jaws they are grim, And a good little child will not play with him. ~ – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 2 »

Who Played With A Loaded By Hilaire Belloc

Who Played With A Loaded By Hilaire Belloc

Who played with a Loaded Gun, and, on missing his Sister was reprimanded by his Father. Young Algernon, the Doctor’s Son, Was playing with a Loaded Gun. He pointed it towards his Sister, Aimed very carefully, but Missed her! His Father, who was standing near, The Loud Explosion chanced to Hear... »

My Jolly Fat Host With By Hilaire Belloc

My Jolly Fat Host With By Hilaire Belloc

My jolly fat host with your face all a-grin, Come, open the door to us, let us come in. A score of stout fellows who think it no sin If they toast till they’re hoarse, and drink till they spin, Hoofed it amain Rain or no rain, To crack your old jokes, and your bottle to drain. Such a warmth in... »

To Exalt, Enthrone, By Hilaire Belloc

To Exalt, Enthrone, By Hilaire Belloc

To exalt, enthrone, establish and defend, To welcome home mankind’s mysterious friend Wine, true begetter of all arts that be; Wine, privilege of the completely free; Wine the recorder; wine the sagely strong; Wine, bright avenger of sly-dealing wrong, Awake, Ausonian Muse, and sing the vineya... »

I, From A Window Where By Hilaire Belloc

I, From A Window Where By Hilaire Belloc

I, from a window where the Meuse is wide, Looked eastward out to the September night; The men that in the hopeless battle died Rose, and deployed, and stationed for the fight; A brumal army, vague and ordered large For mile on mile by some pale general,- I saw them lean by companies to the charge, B... »

The Dromedary Is A By Hilaire Belloc

The Dromedary Is A By Hilaire Belloc

The Dromedary is a cheerful bird: I cannot say the same about the Kurd. ~ – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 1 »

Who Ran Away From His By Hilaire Belloc

Who Ran Away From His By Hilaire Belloc

Who ran away from his Nurse and was eaten by a Lion There was a Boy whose name was Jim; His Friends were very good to him. They gave him Tea, and Cakes, and Jam, And slices of delicious Ham, And Chocolate with pink inside And little Tricycles to ride, And read him Stories through and through, And ev... »

Most Holy Night, That By Hilaire Belloc

Most Holy Night, That By Hilaire Belloc

Most Holy Night, that still dost keep The keys of all the doors of sleep, To me when my tired eyelids close Give thou repose. And let the far lament of them That chaunt the dead day’s requiem Make in my ears, who wakeful lie, Soft lullaby. Let them that guard the hornаed Moon By my bedside their mem... »

Three Graces; And The By Hilaire Belloc

Three Graces; And The By Hilaire Belloc

Three Graces; and the mother were a Grace, But for profounder meaning in her face. ~ On the Ladies of Pixton – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 3 »

How Did The Party Go In By Hilaire Belloc

How Did The Party Go In By Hilaire Belloc

How did the party go in Portman Square? I cannot tell you; Juliet was not there. And how did Lady Gaster’s party go? Juliet was next me and I do not know. ~ Juliet – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 3 »

The Chief Defect Of By Hilaire Belloc

The Chief Defect Of By Hilaire Belloc

The Chief Defect of Henry King Was chewing little bits of String. At last he swallowed some which tied Itself in ugly Knots inside. Physicians of the Utmost Fame Were called at once; but when they came They answered, as they took their Fees, “There is no Cure for this Disease. “Henry wil... »

Wherever The Catholic By Hilaire Belloc

Wherever The Catholic By Hilaire Belloc

Wherever the Catholic sun doth shine, There’s always laughter and good red wine. At least I’ve always found it so. Benedicamus Domino! ~ The Catholic Sun – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 4 »

May All My Enemies Go To By Hilaire Belloc

May All My Enemies Go To By Hilaire Belloc

May all my enemies go to hell, Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel ~ Lines For A Christmas Card – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 3 »

The World Is Full Of By Hilaire Belloc

The World Is Full Of By Hilaire Belloc

The world is full of double beds And most delightful maidenheads, Which being so, there’s no excuse For sodomy of self-abuse. ~ – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 4 »

Heretics All, Whoever By Hilaire Belloc

Heretics All, Whoever By Hilaire Belloc

Heretics all, whoever you may be, In Tarbes or Nimes, or over the sea, You never shall have good words from me. Caritas non conturbat me. But Catholic men that live upon wine Are deep in the water, and frank, and fine; Wherever I travel I find it so, Benedicamus Domino. On childing women that are fo... »

Talking (And Singing) Of The Nordic Man By Hilaire Belloc

Talking (And Singing) Of The Nordic Man By Hilaire Belloc

I Behold, my child, the Nordic man, And be as like him, as you can; His legs are long, his mind is slow, His hair is lank and made of tow. II And here we have the Alpine Race: Oh! What a broad and foolish face! His skin is of a dirty yellow. He is a most unpleasant fellow. III The most degraded of t... »

Who Caroused In The Dirt By Hilaire Belloc

Who Caroused In The Dirt By Hilaire Belloc

Who caroused in the Dirt and was corrected by His Uncle. His Uncle came upon Franklin Hyde Carousing in the Dirt. He Shook him hard from Side to Side And Hit him till it Hurt, Exclaiming, with a Final Thud, “Take that! Abandoned boy! For Playing with Disgusting Mud As though it were a Toy!R... »

Lump Says That Caliban’s By Hilaire Belloc

Lump Says That Caliban’s By Hilaire Belloc

Lump says that Caliban’s of gutter breed, And Caliban says Lump’s a fool indeed, And Caliban and Lump and I are all agreed. ~ On Two Ministers of State – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 4 »

The Whale That Wanders By Hilaire Belloc

The Whale That Wanders By Hilaire Belloc

The Whale that wanders round the Pole Is not a table fish. You cannot bake or boil him whole Nor serve him in a dish; But you may cut his blubber up And melt it down for oil. And so replace the colza bean (A product of the soil). These facts should all be noted down And ruminated on, By every boy in... »

Do You Remember An Inn, By Hilaire Belloc

Do You Remember An Inn, By Hilaire Belloc

Do you remember an Inn, Miranda? Do you remember an Inn? And the tedding and the bedding Of the straw for a bedding, And the fleas that tease in the High Pyrenees, And the wine that tasted of tar? And the cheers and the jeers of the young muleteers (Under the vine of the dark veranda)? Do you rememb... »

The Big Baboon Is Found By Hilaire Belloc

The Big Baboon Is Found By Hilaire Belloc

The Big Baboon is found upon The plains of Cariboo: He goes about with nothing on (A shocking thing to do). But if he dressed up respectably And let his whiskers grow, How like this Big Baboon would be To Mister So-and-so! ~ – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 7 »

When We Are Dead, Some By Hilaire Belloc

When We Are Dead, Some By Hilaire Belloc

When we are dead, some Hunting-boy will pass And find a stone half-hidden in tall grass And grey with age: but having seen that stone (Which was your image), ride more slowly on. ~ The Statue – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 7 »

Lord Finchley Tried To By Hilaire Belloc

Lord Finchley Tried To By Hilaire Belloc

Lord Finchley tried to mend the Electric Light Himself. It struck him dead: And serve him right! It is the business of the wealthy man To give employment to the artisan. ~ – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 4 »

The Species Man And By Hilaire Belloc

The Species Man And By Hilaire Belloc

The species Man and Marmozet Are intimately linked; The Marmozet survives as yet, But Men are all extinct. ~ The Marmozet – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 5 »

Because My Faltering By Hilaire Belloc

Because My Faltering By Hilaire Belloc

Because my faltering feet may fail to dare The first descendant of the steps of Hell Give me the Word in time that triumphs there. I too must pass into the misty hollow Where all our living laughter stops: and hark! The tiny stuffless voices of the dark Have called me, called me, till I needs must f... »

Sally Is Gone That Was By Hilaire Belloc

Sally Is Gone That Was By Hilaire Belloc

Sally is gone that was so kindly, Sally is gone from Ha’nacker Hill And the Briar grows ever since then so blindly; And ever since then the clapper is still… And the sweeps have fallen from Ha’nacker Mill. Ha’nacker Hill is in Desolation: Ruin a-top and a field unploughed. An... »

When Peter Wanderwide By Hilaire Belloc

When Peter Wanderwide By Hilaire Belloc

When Peter Wanderwide was young He wandered everywhere he would: All that he approved was sung, And most of what he saw was good. When Peter Wanderwide was thrown By Death himself beyond Auxerre, He chanted in heroic tone To priests and people gathered there: “If all that I have loved and seen... »

Look, How Those Steep By Hilaire Belloc

Look, How Those Steep By Hilaire Belloc

Look, how those steep woods on the mountain’s face Burn, burn against the sunset; now the cold Invades our very noon: the year’s grown old, Mornings are dark, and evenings come apace. The vines below have lost their purple grace, And in Forreze the white wrack backward rolled, Hangs to t... »

The Scorpion Is As Black By Hilaire Belloc

The Scorpion Is As Black By Hilaire Belloc

The Scorpion is as black as soot, He dearly loves to bite; He is a most unpleasant brute To find in bed at night. ~ – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 6 »

Be Kind And Tender To By Hilaire Belloc

Be Kind And Tender To By Hilaire Belloc

Be kind and tender to the Frog, And do not call him names, As “Slimy skin,” or “Polly-wog,” Or likewise “Ugly James,” Or “Gap-a-grin,” or “Toad-gone-wrong,” Or “Bill Bandy-knees”: The Frog is justly sensitive To epithets like th... »

Remote And Ineffectual By Hilaire Belloc

Remote And Ineffectual By Hilaire Belloc

Remote and ineffectual Don That dared attack my Chesterton, With that poor weapon, half-impelled, Unlearnt, unsteady, hardly held, Unworthy for a tilt with men– Your quavering and corroded pen; Don poor at Bed and worse at Table, Don pinched, Don starved, Don miserable; Don stuttering, Don wit... »

When People Call This By Hilaire Belloc

When People Call This By Hilaire Belloc

When people call this beast to mind, They marvel more and more At such a little tail behind, So large a trunk before. ~ The Elephant – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 2 »

Kings Live In Palaces, By Hilaire Belloc

Kings Live In Palaces, By Hilaire Belloc

Kings live in Palaces, and Pigs in sties, And youth in Expectation. Youth is wise. ~ – Hilaire Belloc Hits: 4 »